Mike Leach Should Retire Immediately and Be a Meteorologist [Video]
Mike Leach is still coaching at Washington State, but after he loses double-digit games this season, the Cougars might try to move on from the enigmatic leader that seems more worried about the job he had last decade than the job he's entering his 7th year in.
Bottom line is that Mike Leach is a wild card.
He's entering the final third of his life and it's about time he settle down and retire into something less stressful than coaching. I've debated for a while what I thought Mike Leach should do after coaching, for awhile I thought he should go into PR because he could make you forget about any scandal by completely changing the narrative and making it someone else's fault or by bringing up aliens.
If he wants to keep coaching, why not pull a June Jones and retire to the CFL. Nobody knows when you lose in Canada. Or, he could take over for Lane Kiffin in Boca Raton when Kiffin inevitably bails for his next opportunity. No one could argue Pullman, Washington is an ideal retirement village.
He could be a professor of Law or History I'm sure, or live out his life having 6 cups of coffee and a conversation to whoever will listen in his favorite coffee shop.
That was all before last night, when every job I've ever imagined for Mike Leach disappeared and only one option remained.
Mike Leach has found his calling as a no nonsense Meteorologist:
"It's gonna be hot, it may be a little less hot than it usually is, but it is going to be hot," Leach droned in his rambling, run-on style of speaking.
Can you imagine the antics of Mike the Meteorologist?
The Weather Channel should call Mike Leach immediately and offer him an hour of television per day, uninterrupted, about the weather, life and how it all correlates.
Mike the Meteorologist is already my favorite character, and I've only seen a 16-second clip of him.
"Whether or not the weather matters today is in entirely dependent on if it in fact makes a difference that it's already humid in the atmosphere," Mike the Meteorologist begins, after taking several seconds to blow deeply into his cup of coffee that was several degrees too warm for his liking.
Leach delved into thought, but the cameras were already off. The Mike Leach Show had ended 20 minutes ago. The live audience had gone back to their lives, but Leach was just hitting his stride, getting into the dynamics between the wind in Lubbock, Texas, and why it's different from the wind in Ames, Iowa.
This isn't Mike Leach's first foray into meteorology. Here's a throwback to when the former Texas Tech coach waited a year to rub it into Ron Roberts' face that he got a forecast wrong during the football season.
Mike Leach might surprise some people in Pullman this season, but if it goes the direction it's trending after a disastrous off-season (losing his quarterback to the NFL and a coaching staff that has had incredible turnover including six new assistants), he might be needing to find work sooner rather than later.
It's safe to say that if Mike Leach can't return to Pullman, Washington and he doesn't want to make a career out of trying to get money from Texas Tech, Mike the Meteorologist could be a real possibility.
There's officially a thunder advisory for the Second Career of the Pirate of Precipitation, the Dew Point Don, the Tornado of Takes, Mike Leach -- and it's incredibly unstable.