It's a fear we all have...we are driving along, minding our own business, when we see the flashing blue lights that indicate that we are being pulled over. Our heart jumps, and we pull over to await our fate.

As you roll down the window, instead of being asked for your license and get asked for your phone number and if you want to hook up later.

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Last week, this ride was spotted at a local WalMart, which caused a double take, until we noticed the markings on the side. This was not a typical patrolman...

...this, is the BOOTY PATROL!

Image-Shawn Farmer
Image-Shawn Farmer

You have the right to remain FINE AS HELL!

A driver in Lubbock has decked out their Mustang in police colors, with some not so subtle differences.

Emblazoned on the side of the vehicle are the words. "BOOTY PATROL", which if memory serves is not an actual police organization. Plus, the vehicle appears to be "Unit 69", and features the slogan "To Protect & Clap Cheeks".

Oh, Jesus...I can hear the following exchange between a parent and child in the car after seeing this on the road.

"Mom? What is the Booty Patrol?"

"Ummm, ask your father."

Here in Lubbock, we have our share of unique rides, such as our beloved Grinchmobile, and the famous Cocaine and Hookers car, but this one is actually a hazard, as impersonating an officer is kind of frowned upon. Plus, it's just kinda stupid.

Anyone who is this obsessed about proclaiming their love of, ahem...booty, is clearly full of good decisions. And, probably still live sin their parents spare bedroom, with a bunch of pages from Low Rider magazine ripped out and taped to the wall. Admittedly, if he fancies himself a police officer, he's probably pretty experienced handling his nightstick.

Don't be fooled, kids.

Happy Motoring.


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